Friday, January 28, 2011

Megan here for Marissa...



Hello to every pair of eyeballs that has taken the time to read this blog of Marissa's, to every mind that has wrapped itself around this truly shocking and life changing reality that is called her life, to every parent praying for health over their children, to every friend of Marissa- whether good, bad, fake, old, new...but mainly, to every heart that has shoved aside its own desires and concerns for the moment- and made room inside of them to take in Marissa's story.




I know alot of people have been following Marissa's updates from my facebook account- I am posting those updates on here today for those of you who have had trouble viewing them- for those of you who I didnt tag or failed to remind- it was nothing personal- just a very busy and long day- so please forgive me.



Fun background I do want you to know (mainly for the people who have NO clue why I have hacked into Marissa's account)




I met Marissa in kindergarten- at Temple Elementary. So we go back far enough to remember borrowing each others purple jelly shoes from the Gap, cheating on spelling tests on Braves Day at school in Dr. Glover's 3rd grade class, Marissa tying a string to my tooth and attaching it to the door knob of her playhouse-swearing to me that "THIS WILL WORK MEG", catching 100 fireflies and releasing them in her bedroom just KNOWING that when we turned the lights out- the fireflies would light the whole room up.. We used to get excited when her mom would take us to the movies in her giant blue astro van to watch movies like "Hunchback of Notre Dame" on the big screen.


We buried a time capsule in her backyard, told all of our dance friends that there were dead people buried in my front yard, tried to convince her brothers their house was haunted for ONE FULL YEAR. No, we didn't go to the same high schools, but did we take prom photos together every year- we sure did. We may or may not have, but definitely did, sign each others yearbooks. People- This is the girl who convinced me that it would be the "Greatest idea I have ever had"- to send each other flowers on Valentine's day in the 8th grade and label them "from your secret admirer"...

If you live in Temple and your house has ever been rolled- Yea. We had a part in that.

For those of you confused about family relation- we started that little white lie in the 6th grade... & well.. you see how long we have kept it running. But to me- she feels like nothing less of family.. cousin may be a bit stretched when in reality, she is more of a sister to me.

I was there for Marissa when Aunt Jennifer passed away. She wiped my tears when my Poppy passed. Skip thousands of heart felt memories later- and she was standing beside me the day I walked down the aisle and married my best friend in the whole world.  & Like so many others that love her- I intend to be there the day she walks down that aisle, and has those babies, and more currently. I intend to be there- the day she smacks down this tumor and whatever comes with it.

Now you know a little bit about the connection with this strong woman I look at each day! Every life she comes into- she touches and leaves a lasting impression on.

I know Marissa has been so touched by every person who has encouraged her with letters, cards, kind words, and prayers. She is so blessed, and she knows that. She has not muttered one word of negativity and expressed a sense of loneliness throughout the entire process. I encourage you all to stay by her side- for this journey still has many twists and turns coming.

I find it fascinating that so many people have learned about her, grown to care for her, even without actually knowing her. To all of the survivors of brain tumors and brain cancer- thank you. Thank you for fighting and winning before her. Thank you for setting the example- and than- standing along side her- when you don't even KNOW her.

You are all diamonds & you will be blessed for your compassion that you offer her.

Now- as I promised you. The updates from yesterday- the day or surgery:

SURGERY DAY- Update #1

Well well well... The blogging torch passes for only a moment I'm sure. Anyone who knows Marissa well enough knows- nothing holds her down for too long.
We got to the hospital this morning around 930 am- she was scheduled to go into surgery prep at 10am- 3.5 hours later- the nurse JUST walked into the lobby and took her back. Aunt Christine went with her. Uncle Brad, My mom, and I are holding down the corner of the waiting room right now.

(Side note on her waiting time: Apparently her doctor had an emergency patient bump Marissa out of her spot for surgery- which threw a wrench in his gears for the whole day.. Marissa's surgery was scheduled for #4- so we had to sit and wait thru the emergency patient & #3.)

For those of you wondering- she was and has been in really really good spirits this morning! Our moms had us both laughing so hard until we had to take a bathroom break- we have all been reminiscing of times come and gone. Memories from old, new, funny, ironic..

Marissa and I have always had the longest history of making fun of our moms together- to their faces.. and our moms dish it right back out.. Among our lobby laughs today- new inside jokes have been established- such as:

"I will never do ZUMBA again without a pantie-liner-- I learned my lesson the first time"- Amy Spivey, 47 years old
"O my gosh- the new American Idol will let all the 15 year olds try out this year-- all because of that JASON BIBER kid"- Christine Parks, 47 years old

Our moms.. have made this day hilarious.
After offending a few people by our volume of laughter and conversation topics- Marissa and I realized that we are still in our pre-kindergarten modes. We see each other and get so loud and obnoxiously hyper fast- then we crash- and yes- as expected from any 4 year old- we spread our pea-coats out on the lobby floor and took a nap.

It is this day- that I will store in my memories of us. Laying here with my oldest, best friend.. and knowing that we are both shoving the reality of the day to the side- and it really wasn't that hard to do.

Our moms left the lobby to go grab some caffeine- and It grew really quiet between Rissa and I. This is the first time today we have just been alone.. Between our cell phones blowing up, nurses probing her and her parents for info every few minutes, and the roaring laughter our fabulous mothers- we realized- we were alone and it was quiet.

She leaned so close I thought we were going to share a new secret- and she swallowed back her tears and said- "Meg, can we pray?"

You know how when you get that lump in your throat- that burns your eyes and makes everything in your torso HOT.
Yea, pretty sure we got that.
I knew her anxiety was finally peeking thru-but here is what shows me her true strength..

ANYONE AND EVERYONE IS PHYSICALLY CAPABLE OF BEING POSITIVE. We all are. Marissa has chosen that road thru this journey- and it looks "Strong" to everyone.. But her strength is so much more than that smile you see when you visit and her common joke of the "brain tumor"...
True strength is shown when the SUPER POSITIVE person, feels fear and weakness- and turns to GOD first. Not to her blog, her texting, her cards and quotes people have sent..
But in her time of anxiety she called upon the one thing that WILL heal this situation.
She said, "Can we pray?"

My mom walked over and led the prayer b/c even I couldn't hold it together long enough to mumble actual words out.

After that- we walked down the hallway to find the maternity ward (not because we feel our clocks ticking- but simply to appreciate the beauty of life.. the beginning of a new person's journey... and we kind of like laughing at some of the names people pick!) After 10 steps past the waiting room- we got distracted and found ourselves right back with our moms.

It may have been God's timing because no sooner than we greeted our lobby buddies, the nurse was ready for her.

Aunt Christine could have lifted a car with the adrenaline that kicked in after the nurse asked for "Parks".. She jumped up- threw her bag to my mom and grabbed Marissa's paperwork.

We all just starred at each other. Marissa's face went flush and that lump came back into all of our throats.. She came in for hug to each of us, My mom, then me, then her Daddy.. The longest hug of all-the most precious display of love.

She said, "Oh my gosh I am nervous now.. But I've got this."

Keep praying and wear your Gray to show your support for brain tumor awareness!!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Update #2


Per my latest facebook status update: Marissa was taken into surgery 15 minutes ago- The nurse has explained that the surgery will be a bit more extensive then what the Dr. explained to her! But her mom said she is doing good back there! We have all eaten and we are now back in the waiting room to wait for round 3!
round 1: waiting to get called into pre-op
round 2: from pre-op to OR---
round 3: O.R.

Expanding on the Nurse- Marissa and her family have been under the impression that the doctor planned on drilling a small hole into the side of the skull today- however, Aunt Christine informed us- during pre-op the nurse told Marissa they would actually be cutting out a piece of her skull- over the size of a walnut. She found out she will be losing more hair than originally promised- luckily Jamie Best - of J. Best Salon in Villa Rica has graciously offered to do extensions for Rissa, free of charge (after she recovers from the surgery and hospital stay)

also- on an awesome note- for those of you keeping up with Marissa's blog- check this out!
Uncle Brad got a phone call today from someone that  has stumbled upon her blog... fast forward to the section where Marissa states she, "Would like a bike- pink and sparkly".
Well, this wish may come  true- as a Bike Shop has contacted Rissa's family and would like to donate this bike to Marissa! I would shout out more credentials- but I don't have all the info I'm sure, and I would hate to say the wrong business name!

On another note- I want to thank all of Marissa's friends and followers for being so awesome! You have touched her life in the smallest way!
The constant encouragement you have offered has been amazing!
Her parents keep getting blessed with food & financial help for Marissa!
Thank you ALL!
I know I don't know all of your names & I don't even know how she knows half of you- but from the bottom of my heart- thank you for loving and supporting her!

Since Marissa has been moving from room room, a few more guests have started to join us here: Candace Saxon, both of her brothers, & her future sister-in-law!

Her family defiantly says they feel the warm wishes and prayers with them today!

~~~~~~~
Just what the doctor ordered

Yep. you guessed it- we are in the waiting room and the doctor is here.

Here is the 411:

1st thing to be thankful for- Marissa being treated here and not Arizona. the doctor literally said to us JUST NOW, "I have no idea what the doctor in Arizona was thinking when he diagnosed her- what he found is nothing like what we found in there today" Arizona informed her that she had a walnut sized tumor with Swelling around it- which was causing the seizures. Infact- the "Swelling" was "Gliomas" dividing.

2nd thing to be thankful for- The NURSES are not the DOCTORS- no disrespect to any nurse out there- but the one she saw today particularly- we are glad was not her doctor. WHY do I say this?- Well the nurse who explained to her that her skull was coming off- WRONG. the doctor just assured us that once they got in there- he decided to go with the pin sized drill! PRAISE THE LORD!

Furthermore- Here is the diagnosis:

They removed pieces of the tumor- the piece will be sent to be tested for cancer and we wont find out anything for ONE week from today! Long week to wait- but she will be extremely sore and tired over the next week- so hopefully thru focusing on rehabilitation- she won't worry herself too much with next Friday. As for her parents- the longest week of their lives, I'm sure.

The gliomas- basically a group of cells which are forming the "tumor" in the lobe and on top of the brain!
if they divide rapidly- this will mean this specific tumor is Malignant-- aka- cancer
If they don't  divide or divide slowly- then this is just a mass of cells grouped together- they will be removed- basically blasted with a form of radiation or medicine to kill those little suckers!

The doctor would not give anyone a definite YES or NO- on whether or not is in infact- cancerous. however, the thing concerning everyone is the fact that these gliomas are growing rapidly enough to cause multiple seizures within two weeks of one another.

Aunt Chris and Uncle Brad are overwhelmed, but with fear of the next steps & lack of answers today, and JOY- as Marissa went thru the surgery fantastically!!! a surgery which usually takes 1.5 hours on average- they finished in an hour!

The doctor is POSITIVE that Rissa won't have a long hospital stay- he is even predicting her moving into a normal room tonight or in the morning- and on to Temple within a day! The only thing that will slow this process down for marissa- is the seizing, hemorrhage, or too much swelling. Her body has been fighting off seizures for over a week now- but the doctors feel as if they are a very possible thing to experience after this surgery!

Everyone- we need to believe together for a positive test result for next friday, we need to believe for a short stay here and quick recovery- and RIGHT NOW- say a prayer and believe for NO SEIZURES.

She will stay with her parents in Temple until they return to Emory for the biopsy results next Friday!
For those of you hoping to visit her at the hospital- I will let you know her room number and her expected stay time as soon as I know!
For those of you hoping to see her after she recoops for a few days- I can let you know her parents address!

Shout out to Candace- Who spelled all of the medical terms in here- after explaining them to me!

~~~~~~~~~
Tid Bits

Ok- The princess has awoke!
She is swollen- as expected- from the fluids, etc.
She has the expected patch of hair missing- but not too bad- and nothing Jamie can't fix for her! Her family got to go back into recovery to see her- and after Candace and I went back- We prepared to see the worst, but surprisingly- it was uplifting to see her that awake and talkative. She is in pain- but they have already started her meds.

They predict she will go into a regular room tonight- and leave tomorrow sometime (so for those of you planning on sending flowers and gifts to the hospital- I would wait and send it to her mom's house- since that is where her full recovery will be spent this week)

Aunt Chris says that anything in the envelope family- small gifts even should be sent to  P.O. Box 305 Temple, Ga 30179
Anything shipped like UPS, flowers, food etc:     82 Lakeview Drive Temple, GA 30179

Her final determining factor which will let us know if she is going into ICU tonight or a regular room tonight- is: Her CT scan.
Which she is in now. Pray for no abnormalities on the scan so she can get into a normal room!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

12 Hours Later
The CT was good.
They found blood on the brain but the Dr. confirmed that it is nothing serious- only the aftermath of major surgery to her brain.
We know her motor skills and personality are the same old Marissa as we have already experienced these comments from her in the past 30 minutes.
"I want the ugly socks and gown off- they are not agreeing with me.."
"I would like frozen yogurt- not that nasty jello- jello is like a giant booger in your mouth"
etc etc

On the more blunt side- some of the conditions of the the recovery room are very startling to my mom and I. It's very hot and sticky in there- noisy- and apparently the nurses have been quite rough when handling Marissa.

When they moved her off of the gurney- they were so rough with her that after the CT was over she refused for them to touch her again. She informed them that she would be walking herself back to her own bed.

This is so disheartening to me. This has been an amazing hospital- she has the best doctors in her corner- but I wish the recovery room nurses were making her feel a bit more comfort.

Laura and Colleen are on their way with dinner for the family and some goodies for Riss! It will be good to see some more smiling faces here- My mom and I are the only ones left in a huge waiting room- and we have already nicknamed all of the fish in Emory's over-sized tank.. Just what are the compensating for with that tank I wonder?? Ga Aquarium will not be threatened by this attempt dear Emory.

Candace had to leave but she was able to tell Marissa goodbye before leaving .. (yes we are still waiting on a room) Candace informed us that when she entered the recovery room Marissa has a rag over her head and she let Candace and the nurses know that she "Does NOT feel well at all, and would like her room now."

The magnitude of pain that the head and brain went thru today have made her ultra sensitive to EVERYTHING. Even the nurses told us we do not need to use a normal speaking voice to her- the very sound of the words send vibrations and signals of pain straight thru her.

She is now on 3 types of pain killers and we are all just ready to see her into a room so she can sleep tonight.

The doctors would like to discharge her tomorrow- so we are gearing for that. For all of you who have stuck with us today- THANK YOU SO MUCH! You are a blessing.


~~~~~UPDATE THUS FAR~~~~~~ One prayer answered super fast- she just got a new nurse in recovery- Aunt Christine came out THRILLED about how nice the new nurse is! YA

~~~~~
Everyday it's True- You Make All YOUR mercies New..

This should sum up the adventure of surgery somewhat- even though we all know this is only the beginning of a journey in her life- that only faith, support and patience will help her thru. 
I spoke with Aunt Chris this morning- Marissa is headed home today! Emory is planning on releasing her around 2pm! 
Marissa did however find out from her doctor today- that the group of cells has indeed grown in size and number since the stay in Arizona. The doctor is not giving her or her family any answers that can lead us believe one way of the other- but the doctors do intend to have a treatment regiment set in place by Thursday or Friday of next week- which is also when she receives the biopsy results. 
As I said earlier- this will be a long week. But nothing that can't be handled.

Marissa was highly overwhelmed by the volume of calls ad texts and emails- she is literally- taken over by the amount of support- It brought tears to her eyes.. which her family and friends can not thank EVERYONE enough for.

Continue to follow her updates and keep those prayers coming! More answers soon- but regardless of the outcome of that biopsy- God is on the throne- and Marissa's life was set out before she was even born.. God doesn't lead us down roads that we meet a dead end on. He doesn't give us more than we can bear. & he will never leave, nor forsake us... So regardless of results- Marissa has got this.

Thank you for letting me share with you some details while she is recovering and still heavily medicated! I am positive she is ready to connect with you all!

- Meganshae

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Simple Things

After not feeling well all weekend, I was determined to make this week a good one! So Monday I woke to see my roommate off to work, and did just that. I went for a walk to Border's and then walked through the park on my way back. You know that saying "someone else is always a little worse than you" SO TRUE. It's amazing how many simple things we take for granted each and every day of our lives. While I was walking I was silently praying and observing simple miracles God gives us everyday. Look outside today and be thankful for beautiful things that you enjoy. It might be your favorite flowers, tree, or even simple sunshine. Be thankful for having the ability to walk and be able to see and enjoy those things, because honestly they are simply wonderful.

On kind of another note, spun from the walk, I am going to invest in a bike. I bet you guys are so excited to see my cute new bike riding the roads of Buckhead. I can't drive for 6 months due to seizures (stupid) and I am way to independent and stubborn to have to wait for people to drive me around. Of course I had no idea what kind of bike to even buy, I was looking at mountain bike, how was I was supposed to know? But with the help of a good friend we found  a cute, "riding" bike. Of course I want pink and sparkly. I'll keep you posted on this adventure

The anxiety of Thursday is starting to slowly taking over my life. I stay up late, I woke up early, and basically I just do not sleep. The way feel is almost impossible to put into words. I am scared, but relieved. Anxious, and nervous, but also excitement to finally get the process started. I go today for an MRI and more Cat Scans. And then surgery tomorrow....EEKS!

I have a few requests. For those of you lifting me up in prayers, I know its human nature, even for me, to pray for selfish things like, no cancer. But, I ask that you pray for God's will, and pray more for acceptance, and patience for me this week and during this journey. Also pray for yourselves! Pray that you guys can all be strong for each other during this time, and be strong for me. I also wouldn't mind if you prayed that I lose as little hair as possible tomorrow hhaha, andddd maybe to be less stubborn. Thanks for keeping me in your prayers, its the greatest gift of all!!! Oh- and the baked goods have to stop. I have to honor of being the maid of honor in Laura and Michael's wedding in April, and I prefer not to be obese while standing on the alter! Thanks!


Thanks to Chloe, Casey, Michael, and Kevin  for filling my apartment with beautiful flowers!!! AND.....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHLOE!!!

Saturday, January 22, 2011

The Clincher....

So, I have insomnia. It's like a timer goes off in my body every morning at 5 am. It sucks. I am sure it's a mixture of nerves I don't express throughout the the day, and the anxiety of having to sit and wait....that is the worse part so far.

SO.....Somewhere through the process of this whole thing, I lost my job. No, I am not joking. I couldn't write a story this good if I tried. I didn't lose it because of my sickness, but my companies new CEO decided to shut down the Atlanta branch which has left me jobless. I haven't quite figured out what I am going to do about this new development yet. Maybe I will win the lottery, or just move to a beach and become a bum. Sounds tempting, right?

I am convinced it is some sort of blessing in disguise since I wasn't released to work right now anyway. But you if you know any marketing or sales jobs in the Atlanta area, I am actively searching!

Today Michelle and Cody are going to visit me from Auburn, and I am thrilled! Tomorrow Katie and Matt are coming, and of course I have the continued support of my everyday backbones Colleen and Laura. Have I told everyone what a lucky girl I am? I don't think I could ask for better friends.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Back in Atlanta

Here's what you guys have all been waiting for.....

I finally got back to Atlanta.  I am so happy to be back in the south, back with my family and friends, and eager and ready to fight this tumor!


I went to the doctor yesterday, and found out some unexpected news. The tumor is in fact on top of my brain, but areas they thought in Arizona that were swelling around the tumor, are more tumor growing and embedded in good tissue of my brain. It can't be removed through surgery without permanently damaging my speech and basically removing too much of the "good" brain. I was hoping they could have made me a little smarter while they were in there!! :)


After seeing many doctors yesterday, next week I will have another MRI to see how much the tumor has grown, and then on Thursday they will remove a piece of the tumor to see if its benign or malignant so we can see what my form of treatment I need. No matter what radiation will be in involved, I am praying no chemo, and no cancer! I KNOW good news is around the corner!!!


Thanks to everyone who has sent me a message, said a prayer, and has helped me in any way! I have the most amazing people in my life, and I am sooo thankful. So again, thank you friends! I love y'all and will keep everyone updated during my journey!

A day never forgotten.

If you guys have never met Casey Schott, she is one of the most amazing people I know. She is one of those people that I don't know how, or when our friendship exactly bloomed, but once it did, it was one of those you knew you would have for the life.


When the doctors told me the news, she silently stood by my side, and she never left. She held my hands, wiped my tears, and honestly made me smile in one of the darkest moments of my life. I am so thankful for her. Chloe and Tucci were just as amazing, and there are no words in the world to explain having them there with me. I am truly a blessed, blessed, blessed girl.


I ended up staying in ICU in Phoenix for 3 days, before they sent me home, and said I would have the tumor removed here. I left believing that the tumor was on top of my brain, and that the we could remove through surgery, and worst case I might have to go through some rehab for speech and strength on the right side of my body.


Things obviously changed..

WAR DAMN EAGLE!


Glendale was the most amazing thing I have ever done. We stayed in Scottsdale, AZ and the amount of Auburn fans was simply amazing. Orange and Blue was everywhere, and I felt like I was living in a dream world. We went out, had the time of our lives. Woke up, tailgated, and I got to watch the game with all of Auburn's die hard fans. It was was simply amazing, and one of the BEST BEST BEST times of my life.

Sadly, Tuesday morning we had to get up, and drive back to LA so we could all catch our flights and head back to the real world. It was ok though, Auburn was the NATIONAL CHAMPIONS. Let me say that again, Auburn Tiger = National Champions. War. Damn. Eagle.

I offered to drive, and just outside of Phoenix I remember looking over at beautiful, little Casey and saying "something is wrong". There was three Angels in the car with me that day, and those three girls will have a special place in my heart for the rest of my life. Casey, Stephanie, and Chloe, I LOVE YOU!

They stayed calm, told me to pull over, and right on the interstate I began to have another seizure. I could hear my friends calling 911. The scary thing about the type of seizures I am currently having is I remember the entire thing. I can hear you, see you, but I have no control of motor skills and I can't respond. To see three of your best friends so worried about you, and not be able to say anything back is a really awful feeling.

I blacked out after the seizure, and was woken, but what I must say, was quite a hunky fire fighter! (haha). I went to the ER,  and so the process began. My friends explained to the doctors what happened, and suddenly another seizure began. After that it kind of seems like a whirlwind of events. I had a cat scan of my head, and the doctor came in and told me the news. It was a brain tumor....

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Going to Glendale....Not an option

Colleen finally came back to me! She brought me some "lucky irish necklace". Everyone else's somehow ended in the trash, and maybeeeeeee I should've left mine in there, too. Kidding, of course. I had given much thought to New Year's Eve, told my parents, and decided I would at least go to the doctor and explain what I thought had happened, thinking something it might be something simple, like low sugar.

 
Each day passed though, and I kept feeling better, and better. The thought of the doctor kept getting pushed further and further back in my mind. Whoops.


Somewhere in the mix of my daily life, one of my best friends, Casey, and I had been playing with the idea of going to Glendale for the National Championship. I am a Die-Hard Auburn fan, and can count the number of games I have missed in the past six years on one hand. I knew this was something I simply had to do. Even if it meant I couldn't eat, shop, or basically live for the next month. I was totally ok with that.


So 4 of us did. We all booked flights to LA, stayed with Casey, and roadtripped to from LA to Scottsdale, AZ. War Eagle!

2011- The Year of the Unknown

I should have known that when my roommate, best friend, and better half left me for ten days, my year was going to start of with a bang.

I lived with Leeny in college, and in some sense, she has been the more "sane" one of the two. Again- in some sense. She left me right before Christmas to head to Ireland , her mainland for the holidays, and it was going to be our first New Year's Eve apart in years.
I had two of my other dear friends Randall and Kim come into two the Thursday before, and we were convinced it would be the best weekend of our lives. We spent hours shopping for our New Year's outfits around Atlanta before we finally headed to my apartment to "relax" before our big night. If you know my friends and myself, we do everything to extremes, and I knew NYE would be no different.  We spent the day drinking some champagne, eating frozen pizza, and catching up on Real Housewives, duh. After I rested, I got up to start getting to ring in 2011, and I didn't know that would be the moment my life would change dramatically....
I got up to get in the shower, and felt completely fine. My sparkley new black dress was waiting for my evening out, and the rest of my friends were heading over in the next couple of hours. When I got in the shower that night, however, I got a really strong bad taste in my mouth. I brushed it off at first, but then my jaw started to uncontrollable move to the right. I remember I started praying, not knowing what was going on, and grabbed the side of the shower to brace myself for what was next. At that point I tried to yell for help, and turn the water off realizing I had no control over my body. I remember shaking for a bit uncontrollably, but the next few minutes were kind of a blur. Kim finally realized I was taking a long shower, came in to find me a sleep in my bathroom floor.

I felt like I was making it up. That didn't happen, I had never felt that way before, and when trying to convey what I thought had happen in the shower to my friends, it made no sense. So being the crazy person I am, I napped, I rallied and I went out anyway- Soberly, of course.

The night ended up being wonderful, and looking back I am so glad I decided to continue my life normally. I got to see Composed-Kim back bad decisions, danced a lot, met some wonderful people, and overall had a great night!!!